Pre-orders for Grief is a Hurricane are now open. Reserve your copy today.
Pre-orders for Grief is a Hurricane are now open. Reserve your copy today.
author of Grief Is a Hurricane
About Me
I’m Robin A. Gillette – author of Grief Is a Hurricane: Poems of Empowerment in the Face of Loss, former Licensed Clinical Social Worker, and someone who has walked through the darkest storm imaginable and come out the other side with words, poetry, and an abiding belief in the human capacity to heal.
Grief found me in a way I never could have prepared for. What followed was not a tidy journey through well-marked stages, but a real, messy, sometimes beautiful navigation of loss.
My life’s work as a social worker, now as a poet has always been about honoring each person’s unique path forward. Grief doesn’t follow a script, and neither should healing.
My Story
In March of 2022, my husband Ray was diagnosed with bladder cancer. We were assured that it was caught in time for Ray to make a recovery, but I was reluctant to tell my 93 year old father who had always been close to my husband. When I did eventually inform my dad, he stood up out of his chair and grabbed me in one of his bear hugs and said, “I know what you need me to do. I’ll take care of him, Rob, don’t you worry.” Three months later, my father died unexpectedly from COVID. Five months later, Ray took a turn for the worst and died unexpectedly. I now face the world without the two most important people in my life. In spite of the wonderful friends and family who regularly reached out to me, the world became a very cold and lonely place.
When I reached out for some help in navigating this storm of emotions I found myself in, I discovered that there was a huge void in the mental health world due to the need that arose during and post COVID. My calls were not returned.
One day while shopping at HomeGoods, I discovered a short aisle with shelves of journals. I sat on the floor and picked up and felt through the pages until I found a journal that felt right in my hands. I returned home, found a pencil, and words floated peacefully in my brain and made their way onto the page with pencil in hand. I sat and wrote daily and with each day came new ideas that were born from a bird singing in my back yard, a conversation I had with a friend, or the silly antics of my four month old puppy.
How I came about writing poetry is important. I never thought of myself as a poet, however, when it came to expressing my feelings, I found writing as natural as breathing. It demonstrated to me that no one knows what is going to help when faced with this hurricane of grief. However, when you find something that helps, hold on to it, value it, and know that it’s okay if it doesn’t work for anyone else, but if it works for you, do it, and do it often.
As a retired social worker, I value an individual’s right to self determination and self dignity in a manner in which one can heal in a way that best suits him or her. Acknowledging that everyone has unique grief experiences with the goal of moving toward normalizing their feelings. So, if you wake up and you’re feeling a bit exhausted in this grief storm, maybe it’s a day where you take care of yourself, find rest when can and eat really healthy. If you wake up rejuvenated, in the eye of the storm, call your friends and have a good day! This is how we navigate grief, with respect to ourselves and how we are feeling emotionally and physically, and respond accordingly. Respect ourselves, honor the truth about grief and we can then all heal and grow together.
I invite you to explore Grief Is a Hurricane, join a conversation, or simply spend time here at your own pace, in your own way.
